JonBent VACAY

So on my trip across the country out of Boston and into this kick to the face known as Los Angeles, we did a lot of fun stuff. Baseball games, bars, and extravagant truck stops; but nothing compared to visiting one of my favorte pop culture hotspots, Boulder, CO former home of JonBenet Ramsey. Mike and I had some fun.




It's true, she was strangled.




















What you can't see is the house is for sale. I feel bad for the reality agent. I imagine her bringing people in to see the house and them thinking that they've seen it before but can't remember where. If only there was a dead child on the floor, then they would say "oh riiiiiigghhtt". I wish they would put at least a fake body on the ground, if not for nostalgia's sake, at least to boost the home decor. I remember seeing photos back in the day and thinking that it really tied the room together.

God Damnit Carson Daly

Alright, so last week, me and my buddy Ryan found out that Nas was going to be performing a mini concert on the NBC lot in Burbank. This was good news for two reasons. Nas happens to be one of the best rappers alive and Ryan works on the NBC lot so he could get us in with little effort. Ryan scored two passes but there was a small catch to being able to see this little performance, that catch being in order to get into it, we had to sit through a taping of Last Call: with Carson Daly.


One would think that this is a small price to pay in order to see their favorite musician. This would be true in every other circumstance except for this certain one certin occasion. The hype man that warms up the audience for the show was one of those guys who was really happy go lucky guy, but in private with no audience to entertain, he does poppers just to remind himself that he exists.

Anyways, it was this asshole that had the nerve to get up in front of an audience and tell me that Nas isn't coming. But he doesn't say it out right. He just says "Young Jeezy is here!" Now I'm not the brightest bulb in the box, but I do know this. Young Jeezy is not Nas. Not even close to Nas. Oddly enough most of the audience caught on too this as well. Several shouted "what about Nas". No answer. That hype man bastard just stood there with that waxy smile on his face. But he doesn't tell us this until after the taping has begun. That means THERE IS NO ESCAPE. You can't leave the studio aside from shitting you own pants and being escorted out. I don't have that kind of will power.

So we sat through an interview with Jamie Kennedy who was pro moting the program The Ghost Whisperer. A show about Jennifer Love Hewitt and how she talks to ghosts.....this is on television....and now Jamie Kennedy talks to them too. On the next show was that tatted out chick from LA ink, who used to be on Miami Ink but was too much of a bitch to last on that show. So her and Caron babbled about god knows what for five minutes....five jokeless, souless minutes. The only redeeming moment was when Jim Norton sat on stage and talked about Hillary Clinton's vagina, which is entertain for as long as ou don't picture what her vagina looks like. Did you picture it yet? Give it a second........yeah there it is. It really sucks doesn't?

So Nas, I like your stuff. But the whole no show at Carson Daly and making me sit for 3 hours and listen to fucking drivel about Ghost Whisperer and tattoos....for three hours. And then holding out, thinking maybe, just maybe, you would show up on stage, but no. Just Young Jeezy. Just that sad bastard Young Jeezy. Maybe they thought they could stick any rapping black man on stage and people wouldn't know the difference?

(Is this NaS?)











Or is this Nas? Who cares!? Whitey won't know the difference!

So rather than having a fun time and see Nas, I was filled with saddness and anger. Mostly anger. This was heavily due to the fact that I left the show with a Young Jeezy song and the image of Hilary Clinton's Hoo HAA stuck in my brain. God Damn.

Campagin 08 (kill me)

After watching debate number deux deux, I was forced to reflect upon the debates of weeks past. I apologize for the delay, but hey I got a busy schedule and sometimes a man needs to catch up with his on demand. Greedy? Maybe but who gives a shit, Californication and Mad Men are worth it.

So the first debate. all I can say is that if I had to hear the word Pork Barrell spending one more time, I was going to find an actual barrel filled with pork products and drop the fucking thing on my head just so I can get the echo of the candidates' voices out of my head. Despite issues with the economy, most of the first debate focused on Iraq. Quit flashing back to who voted for what when. We all know Iraq was a collasal shit show.

Our economy was the main topic of the debate on Tuesday. Needless to say, it's in the toilet and all these fuckers can do is bitch back and forth about who said what in the past. Fuck you! YOu are both full of shit. The economy is in the toilet due to fucking banking deregulation dating back to the Reagan era. Cancel funding for the arts and decrease regs on big business. Thanks Ronny This ushered in the era of trickle down economics. FYI; that trickle that the middle class is feeling is the champagne laced piss of this country's wealthy, drizzling over their domes.

As usual I'm off track. I want to get back to that idea of deregulation. While Reagan brought with him trickle down economics, he also welcomed the decline of the American product. Supposedly we are one of the richest countries in the world, but how? We don't make anything anymore. Cars..the Japanese. Electronics....fuck also the Japanese, the only thing we seem to produce is cheese and milk. I don't know why, dairy is gross. The real deal is that we have been making our money over the past 2 decades from buying and owning debt. Nothing tangible...just debt. What good is debt if the person or company can't cover the tab.

This is whats gone on with the Liquid Paper Industry (loans not white out), allowing companies to take out hundreds of billions of dollars for short term loans without ever blinking an eye. Thanks to those fucks at AIG, who in their brilliant wisdom, took out a multi-hundred million dollar loan which those silly bitches had no way of paying back. Simply turned their pockets inside out and said "sorry brah...I'm fresh outta cash". The worst part about the whole thing is the government (w/ our tax dollars) are bailing them out. If I took out a loan, and on payday, didn't pay it back...my already bad knees would be made worse by someones louisville slugger.

That may be a drastic comparison but the problem is that the government didn't learn their lesson when the dotcom industry happened. NO REGULATIONS STILL. Business carried on unbothered by the government. No restraint, not even a stop 'n chat just to make sure what thYe were doing was legal. No no no, we can't do that. That wouldn't be free enterprise. So for years corporations were allowed to push paper around and jump through loop holes that would allow them to do things like Netting out (buying shit they didn't have money for) or using Credit Default Swaps (CDS) one of the biggest causes of this crisis. CDS' are when investors could buy and collect insurance on bond they don't even own. If a company or individual knows a company is close to failing, it can pay a 2% insurance on a bond worth 10o times that. WHen that bond fails they can collect the full amount. INSURANCE MONEY ON A BOND THEY NEVER EVEN FUCKING OWNED. If you buy car, I shouldn't be able to buy insurance on YOUR car that is in YOUR name, and when YOU crash it, I get the money. None of this is regulated, CDS does not occur on the open market. To even play ball you have to have at least 5 million is cash. FUCK THAT. All of this is gone into extreme detail in Chicago Public Radio's "This American Life".

And now our tax dollars have to fix their gambling debts and I am not pleased. Worst of all, a story on NPR discussing AIG's nonprofit donations. This company is donating millions of dollars to nonprofits. Tens of Millions. The government is now bailing them out, giving them shit loads. AIG still vows to give this money. This sounds nice but AIG aren't the ones donating the money any more. It's us. OUr tax dollars from the bailout are going to these non profits. Look....I'm all for donating to charities; if you can afford it. AIG can't fucking afford it, hence the whole...you knowwwwwwwwww ECONOMIC CRISIS!

Obama talked about regulation. McCain didn't.

PS. I could talk about Palin but I believe SNL and Bill Mahr and every other comedian have said just about all that needs to be said. I just want to reiterate a few things. Creationism, No Abortion no matter, stands by abstinence only education while having a pregnant 17 year old daughter, hockey mom, gun toting, no experience, the katie couric interview........im tired, peace and grease.